> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://thepulse.org/en/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # You Ask, Carola Answers: How Do You Make a Shared Living Week Work? - URL: https://thepulse.org/en/how-to-run-a-shared-living-week/ - Published: 2025-05-19T08:15:55.000Z - Updated: 2026-11-06T18:35:53.000Z - Description: Carola Holfeld just finished a great shared living week. How does she plan something like that? What did she pay attention to? What was her biggest fail? We asked her, and she brought in input from other youth leaders to give us as many tips as possible. - Author: Carola Holfeld - Tags: Articles, #target-leaders, #age-teens, #topic-summer-camp, #context-camp, #translation-pending [**Carola Holfeld**](https://thepulse.org/en/author/carolaholfeld/) *just finished a great shared living week. How does she plan something like that? What did she pay attention to? What was her biggest fail? We asked her, and she brought in input from other youth leaders to give us as many tips as possible.* **Hey Carola, you recently said this was one of your “best shared living weeks ever.” What made you say that … and what is a shared living week, anyway?** Well, to be honest, this time I didn’t do a real shared living week at all. A shared living week traditionally lasts a whole week. The entire youth group moves into the church building and goes through completely normal school days together. A temporary shared household, basically. A shared living week deliberately takes place during the week, so that the teenagers really share everyday life and simply get to spend lots of time together. This time it was different for us. Our teen group is so small right now that we kept it to three days. Also, right now we’re only girls, which makes for a unique mix where depth and good conversations are pretty much guaranteed. I had been really looking forward to it this year, and it was absolutely brilliant. Between sandwich makers, evening devotionals and far too little sleep, a shared living week develops a dynamic that goes far beyond what an ordinary youth group night can achieve. **So how do you structure a shared living week?** While regular youth programs take teenagers out of their everyday lives, a shared living week has the potential to bring faith and community into everyday life. Roughly speaking, a shared living week consists of four elements that repeat every day: 1. Everyone goes to school or work. Normal life goes on, with all appointments and (almost) all hobbies 2. Spending time together, free play 3. Eating together 4. A guided evening program with spiritual input and room for deep conversations This year’s shared living week started with dinner together on Wednesday evening and ended with cleaning up together on Saturday morning. ![A woman with a microphone talks with five teenage girls sitting in red armchairs on a church stage. Behind them are a wooden cross lit in yellow and a projected poll slide asking in German “What does worship mean to you?” with a word cloud of answers](https://thepulse.org/en/content/images/2026/11/Gottesdienst-Thema-Lobpreis-1.jpg) Then the girls had time to rest at home, catch up on sleep and take a shower in peace, and on Sunday morning we led the church service together. Everyone’s different ways of getting to school left us with a few logistical puzzles, but we managed to solve them well. Everyone made their own lunch, in shifts, so to speak, since they all got back from school at different times. I put sandwich fixings and cornflakes out on the table for self-service, and everyone cleaned up after themselves. From 1 to 5 p.m. there was no official program, and everyone could spend the afternoon however they liked. Games and sports all happened spontaneously. This time we also set up a small prayer room in case anyone wanted to come before God in peace and quiet. At 5 p.m. we started cooking together, splitting into teams for cooking and washing dishes. A youth leader friend of mine invited different people from the church to cook with the teens in the evenings during his shared living week. Everyone loved it. In the evenings we had a “normal” teen program with singing, a talk, sharing and prayer. This time we also held a worship night with Communion. And as the highlight of the week, we all went bowling together on Friday night. The evening program should be mandatory, and ideally the shared meals too. ![A teenage girl speaks into a microphone, seated in a red armchair next to four other girls on a church stage, with a wooden cross lit in yellow behind them and a woman standing to the right listening](https://thepulse.org/en/content/images/2026/11/Gottesdienst-1.jpeg) Because we had planned a project, the church service, I chose a spiritual theme for the week that we could also put to good use in the service: Paul and Silas’s missionary journeys. The theme of the service was then “Worship at Midnight.” I interviewed the teens about it, they also hosted an interactive poll with the people at the service, one girl preached together with me, and the others led the service. They were totally hyped from the great week and practically swept the congregation along with their passion and joy. Themes of earlier shared living weeks without a project like this included personality, identity, gifts and spiritual gifts. My fellow youth leaders started their shared living week right after the service on Sunday and kept going until the following Saturday. My colleague Tabea is convinced: “This time frame is ideal, because that way you have everything cleaned on Saturday and no stress on Sunday morning. One time we only had 4 days, Thursday to Sunday, and that was a different story.” **What would you say is the most important goal of a shared living week?** Above all, what we want from this week is to strengthen our community. **How did you pay for your shared living week?** We worked out the cost of the food and multiplied it by the number of days. We paid for the outing from the youth group fund. For a shared living week that runs the whole week, costs are usually between 40 and 60 euros for food and a special event; the church normally provides the space for free. **What logistics tips do youth leaders have?** - Timing: Hold the shared living week right before or after report cards come out, when there are no tests coming up at school. - Enough rooms. Bedrooms not right next to the common rooms. A quiet room where nobody talks and you can simply spend time with God on your own. - Getting to school: Have the teens sort it out themselves beforehand, or make a ride list to make sure everyone gets to school - Oversight and leadership: One person keeps track of everything and is in charge of organizing, shopping and so on. Don’t lead a shared living week on your own. A good co-leader is worth their weight in gold. - Only cook a hot meal in the evening; at lunchtime, people eat in shifts: sandwich buffet and cereal (a sandwich maker is worth its weight in gold!) - Collect parental consent forms right at registration - Check with someone from the church (or its leadership) whether you can turn to them for troubleshooting, meaning if bigger problems come up. **What was the best game of the week?** Well, in our group, [**Hide-and-Seek in the Dark**](https://thepulse.org/en/50-best-games-for-youth-ministry/#29-hide-and-seek-in-the-dark) is always really popular. At other shared living weeks, [**the murder game**](https://thepulse.org/en/50-best-games-for-youth-ministry/#22-nights-in-palermo) is the highlight. Everyone draws a name, and that’s the person they have to kill. Whoever is still alive at the end wins. **Among Us in real life** is similar. ![Five teenage girls and a woman in glasses laughing and striking poses with colorful bowling balls in a bowling alley lit in blue](https://thepulse.org/en/content/images/2026/11/Bowlingbahn-1.jpg) Spontaneous sports activities are great too, and for us, of course, bowling at the end of the week was THE highlight! **Did you have a ritual you’d definitely recommend?** Every evening, time to share and pray for each other: that was our most important element. It often got really deep. **Would you recommend projects like your church service as part of a shared living week?** Hmmmm. This time it was perfect. We were a small group, and it was pretty easy to involve the teens within a framework I set and, so to speak, “make them shine.” The effect on the church was really lovely. Youth leader Tabea told me that her group once did a car-vacuuming day where church members could bring their cars to the church. But first and foremost, I’d recommend focusing on the community within the youth group. Sometimes projects help build community, sometimes they don’t. What works for you? **What was your personal fail as a youth leader during a shared living week, and why?** Haha, well, my colleagues and I can tell you about several fails. For example, we once planned a shared living week right in the middle of the school’s main exam period. Or we sent the kids home in the afternoon to rest and shower, and afterward they were wide awake and full of energy all night. Tabea says: “I thought if I planned everything well, it would all run by itself. But everyday life is unpredictable. Some people show up late for cooking, others don’t come back at all in the afternoon. You have to learn to live with that. As a leader, I also have to learn to take good care of myself even during a week like this, because otherwise little things can get on my nerves pretty easily toward the end of the week.” Another youth leader admits: “One year I didn’t have enough trust in the group, so I didn’t dare to do the shared living week. But that year there also wasn’t a second person I could have pulled it off with.” My colleague Jonathan confirms that it can get really difficult when 25 teenagers live together. “As a leader, it can be really challenging to get everyone to do the tasks that are needed to make it work.” My colleague Tabea sums it up: “Shared living weeks are more challenging than camps. I wouldn’t have thought so, since you’re in your own building. But because everyday life goes on and gets combined with a program, it can lead to unreliability, chaos and conflict.” **What was the highlight of your shared living week?** The special outings like bowling or ice skating are unforgettable. But the highlight of a shared living week is definitely the community that grows and the steps individuals take in their faith. My colleagues and I experience it every time, and that’s why we love shared living weeks and, as soon as one is over, are already looking forward to the next one 😄. **Thanks for your tips, Carola!** You’re very welcome, Priscilla. Below are a few examples of a shared living week. ### Sample shared living week, Wednesday to Saturday **Wednesday** 6:00 p.m. Move into the church building 7:00 p.m. Dinner 8:00 p.m. Session 1: Talk and discussion 9:00 p.m. Set up the prayer room 10:00 p.m. Maybe a bedtime story 😊 **Thursday** 5:00 p.m. Cooking: Team 1, 3 girls 6:00 p.m. Dinner 7:00 p.m. Session 2: Talk 8:30 p.m. Prayer night in the prayer room: repentance, adoration, praise, requests, Communion, blessing each other **Friday** 1:30 p.m. Hot lunch 4:00 p.m. Session 3: Talk and preparing Sunday’s service, working through everything once and practicing 6:30 p.m. Prepare a cold supper with Team 2 (salad, wraps, toast) 7:00 p.m. Eat supper 8:00 p.m. Head out for bowling 10:30 p.m. Back, and depending on the mood, maybe a late-night program with whatever else you feel like doing: movie night, games and so on **Saturday** 9:30 a.m. Laid-back breakfast, looking back on our days living together, spiritual wrap-up, praying together and blessing, final details for Sunday’s service: all set? Tidying up and cleaning ### Sample shared living week, Sunday to Saturday **Sunday** 1:00 p.m. Lunch, then sports in the gym 6:00 p.m. Dinner 7:00 p.m. Chores 7:30 p.m. Talk 8:30 p.m. Bouldering 11:00 p.m. Lights out **Monday to Friday** 6:00 a.m. Morning prayer 6:30 to 8:00 a.m. Breakfast buffet 8:00 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. School 2:00 to 3:00 p.m. Lunch buffet 3:30 p.m. Chores 4:00 p.m. Homework / free time 6:00 p.m. Dinner 7:00 p.m. Chores 7:30 p.m. Talk 8:30 p.m. Bouldering / worship night / casino night / game in the dark 11:00 p.m. Lights out **Saturday** 8:00 to 9:00 a.m. Breakfast buffet 9:00 to 9:30 a.m. Cleanup 9:30 a.m. Outing 2:30 p.m. End